MY JOURNEY ..... YOUR STORY

introduced to Christ when i started school - St Anthony's Convent. we had morning prayers and hymns together with national anthem and school song. we had mass in the chapel and for some of us it was a break away from lessons, a time to rest our eyes, a time to do nothing. for me it was a break and sometimes a short nap. :)

all i remembered was that i could ask for anything from heaven by going through Mother Mary. i believed because everytime i lose something, i'll pray and i'll find it. it was a process that always worked. childlike faith? i guess so. there were no doubts then. i just believed. now that i think back, i didn't pray through Mary, i just asked to be led to where my lost items were and waited for signs. sadly, there was also no deep or sincere gratitude. just a simple "thank you" after that.

this went on all through my school days. however, somewhere along the way, i forgot about the asking for assistance or directions. i made things happen on my own and depended on my own strength.

sometime after seconday school, a friend brought me a to a Christian service...CULTURE SHOCK! where were the books? where was the process? where were the instructions? there was nothing for me to follow! i didn't know when to kneel or when to stand or what to say. however, i enjoyed the service. lost contact with my friend soon after and didn't step into a church after that until some years later for my sister's baptism. started going on and off with my family as shortly after that, my parents and sisters got saved and baptised but not me.

...the story continues in "my journey".

was sharing with a friend why i didn't want to go to church in the past. there were many reasons but the main one was that i felt vulnerable in church. i didn't want to break down in front of strangers. i didn't want to hear the truth because it hurts. i came back and read my very first post in july 2009...and these words stood out like a sore thumb. "i did not need anyone to be with me. i just needed God to be there for me. as long as i believe, He will take care of me."

those times of "being looked after" were reassuring but it was not happy and loved. "reassuring" seems ok during those times. it was enough. because i was hurting inside, that was all i needed. little did i know, there can be more. little did i know that the Lord is capable of giving more, of giving more than what i need if i am willing to receive.

the day i surrendered myself totally was like emptying all the contents within and the joy of being filled with the Holy Spirit can never be described in words. it is something i will never forget...a reminder to always empty myself for the Lord to work in me...full surrender for Him to move me and to lead me. the more i give of myself, the more i receive for myself.

the joy of being in His presence has now surpassed the "face" issue. i look forward to going for service every week. times before and after service are meeting of friends for support and to learn from each other. once in the hall and when service starts, it is just me and my God. it is our time...my time to praise and worship and to thank Him for all that He has done for me and His time to love me and to strenghthen me with His word. it is a time for me to be taught of His ways.

the day when nothing else matters anymore, the day of full surrender ... is the day i was set free.

11:16 PM;
to love You from the inside out

the beginning my journey talk to me my inspiration prayer requests what you missed credits and quotes MySpace Playlist at MixPod.com

the beginning
my journey
talk to me
my inspiration
prayer requests
what you missed
credits and quotes

MySpace Playlist at MixPod.com